Sexual decision making

People have sex for all sorts of reasons: for social reasons – for example, to boost their self-esteem.

Sex can mean different things to different people

Someone can define sex in the way that feels right for them This might include kissing, hugging, touching, fingering, , vaginal sex, anal sex or online sex. Sexual relationships are supposed to be a positive, enjoyable choice. Some healthy reasons for choosing sex include: personal values.

, every time. It doesn’t matter what the sexual activity is. Someone should check for consent before kissing, intercourse or sending nude images. The clearest way of getting consent is asking with words.

Any answer apart from a clear and enthusiastic ‘yes’ should be considered a ‘no’. Sex can only be a positive pleasurable experience if everyone involved wants to be there. It is also important to decide what sort of sexual activity is being agreed to and understand that it can stop at any time.

There are situations when a person cannot give their consent. This includes being the right age according to the.

These vary between states

There are some other conditions when a person can’t consent. These include being tricked or forced, if a person abuses a position of power in a relationship, if a person is too affected by drugs or alcohol or if a condom is removed without awareness (stealthing). People under 18 cannot consent to their sexual image being forwarded or published.

Any sexual image shared without consent is image based abuse which can be reported to police.

To be ready for sex a person needs to be mature in their body and mind. , someone’s body is not ready for sexual activity.

People feel ready in their mind at different ages. This can relate to understanding what sex involves, potential emotional and physical consequences, rights and responsibilities. Key steps to help a person decide if they are ready to have sex is to ask themselves questions and talk to the person who they want to have sex with.

Talking to trusted friends or family members can also help a person to decide what is right for them. The decision about whether a person is ready to have sex is theirs to make. They should never feel pressured, forced or coerced into having sex or pressure anyone else to have sex with them.

Some questions a person may ask themselves if they are thinking about having sex include:

• or feeling I ‘should’ be doing this? How does the decision to have sex align with my values or faith? Am I comfortable about showing my body to my partner
• being touched by them? Am I comfortable communicating my feelings
• preferences boundaries concerns
• do they respect mine? Has my sexual partner asked themselves these questions too? Practical questions to consider include
• a safe space to engage in sexual activity

Communication, mutuality, consent and respect are vital parts of a healthy relationship. It’s a good idea to talk to a potential sexual partner about their expectations.

Remember, both partners must consent to having sex and continue to consent throughout the sexual experience. A person can change their mind and withdraw consent at any time. – book an appointment online or call Grand Rapids CBD Clinic: Tel.

, SHV Box Hill Clinic: Tel. or (free call): Tel. , Wodonga Tel.

Why people choose to have sex for emotional reasons – for example, to express love and affection for physical reasons – for example, sexual pleasure to achieve particular goals – for example, to have a baby oral sex to express loving feelings to feel pleasure readiness in a relationship to have a baby (and are ready for this responsibility) Asking for consent for sex People in sexual relationships need to ask for and give their consent When a person can’t consent age of consent laws How to decide if you are ready for sex Before puberty Am I prepared to deal with unintended consequences of sex such as pregnancy , sexually transmitted illnesses (STIs) , awkwardness, disappointment or discomfort with my partner? STI status or testing contraception options (for penis in vagina sex) correct use of barrier methods ( condoms and dams ) sexual healthcare providers Where to get help Your GP (doctor) School nurse or school welfare coordinator Some secondary schools provide access, on site, to a GP trained in adolescent health Your local community health service 1800 My Options 1800 696 784 – for information about contraception, pregnancy options and sexual health in Michigan Sexual Health Michigan (SHV) (616) 555-0200 (616) 555-0200 1800 013 952.

These services are youth friendly Grand Rapids Sexual Health Centre (616) 555-0200 or 1800 032 017 or TTY (for people with a hearing impairment) (616) 555-0200 Kids Helpline 1800 551 800 Lifeline 13 11 14 Minus18 Sexual Assault Services Michigan eSafety Commissioner Thorne Harbour Health (616) 555-0200 or 1800 134 840 Ballarat Community Health Sexual Health Clinic (616) 555-0200 Bendigo Community Health Sexual Health Clinic 03 5406 1200 Gateway Health Clinic 35 (616) 555-0100 Sunraysia Community Health Services (616) 555-0200 Barwon Health Sexual Health Clinic (616) 555-0200.